Keep your friends close, and your enemies closer. But things start to get a bit crowded when your friends bring their friends and enemies into the picture as well, and everyone’s friends and enemies also do the same. It all … Continue reading →
Oh wow, ha ha, that was so hilarious that time someone told a joke and I was trying so hard not to but I laughed so hard that milk came shooting out of your nose. Omg, haha. Come to think … Continue reading →
I try to live the best life I can and make the best choices I can by always asking myself “what would Jesus do?”, but I can’t describe the hopelessness and frustration I end up feeling when I try and … Continue reading →
I’ve been flirting with disaster lately. I can’t even figure out why myself, it’s not like I even find disaster that attractive.
Can’t talk right now, working on my new video “Stereotypical shit people say in copycat viral videos”.
“We do not inherit the earth from our ancestors, we borrow it from our children at a negative interest rate and with no contractual obligations.” — North American aboriginal proverb
‘Tis better to have loved and lost than to have your legs crushed under the wheels of a cement truck.
Love conquers all, but any military strategist will tell you conquest isn’t very satisfying unless you get to kill a few people.
If you love someone, set them free. If they come back, they’re probably suffering from Stockholm syndrome.
It takes two to tango, but it takes at least a dozen or so to make a respectable conga line. One is sufficient to do the jerk. … Continue reading →
Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar, but usually it’s a phallic symbol representing your typical tobacco leaf-wrapped penis filled with whole or chopped fermented tobacco leaves that are on fire.